5 Imaginary Friends You Need
Amos was my hubby’s imaginary friend. When they were wee lads, they fought epic battles in the Wild West and in many foreign lands, that is until Amos was sniped by an enemy soldier in WW2.
Kelli didn’t have imaginary friends. She had imaginary enemies. Lots of them. And they were frogs. We’d be driving peacefully down the highway and suddenly she’d break into hysterics, begging me to get the frogs out of the car. Her theatrics were so convincing that at times (and being a typical young mom who always feared the worst) I wondered if two-year-olds were capable of schizophrenic episodes. I confess I pulled the car over once or twice and rolled down the window to let the frogs escape. (Okay, I’m kind of embarrassed to admit that, but those episodes were freaky.)
Randi had imaginary fiances, all animated, all destined to become her husbands: Tony the Mouse, Simba from The Lion King, and Danny Phantom.
I, on the other hand, never had an imaginary friend. And maybe 40-something is too old to start, but I’ve decided I need one…maybe even a whole gang of them. Here’s who I would add to my BFF list:
Imaginary Friend #1
I need an imaginary friend who will move my half-gallon of creamer from the pantry where I put it to the refrigerator where it goes…so when I need to turn my coffee from black to white in the morning, my half-n-half doesn’t come out of the carton in chunks.
Imaginary Friend #2
I need an imaginary friend who will finish my sentences. Not like the “soul mate” I-know-you-so-well kind of finish my sentences, but those sentences I start and about eleven words in I…
(What was I going to say?)
Imaginary Friend #3
It would be great to have an imaginary friend to hand me one of the six pairs of cheap reading glasses that should be placed in various strategic locations throughout the house, yet not a single pair is where it’s supposed to be. I don’t know who keeps moving my glasses or how they all end up on the bathroom counter.
Imaginary Friend #4
It’s pretty lonely at 3:00 AM when I’m wide awake and my family is sound asleep. I want an imaginary friend to watch infomercials with me and convince me I don’t really need the wonder product being pushed by a person who has too much perk at this hour. Or she could read to me until I’m sleepy, or possibly talk through whatever worries are keeping me up at night.
Imaginary Friend #5
And I’d really like a friend who would consume all the calories from my Double-Stuf Oreos, so I could binge on a whole row of my guilty pleasure minus the guilt. (Change that to thin mint Girl Scout cookies. A box is in plain view at this moment.) Then she could do a little yoga or take a brisk walk to burn off any calories that might have sneaked through with the intent of landing permanently on my thighs.
Yes, life would be a little sweeter…a little saner…if we moms had an imaginary tribe tailored to suit our individual needs. And as I read through my list, I have to laugh (or cry). My friends are showing my age! I’m sure fifteen years ago my list might have looked a little different.
So how about you? What imaginary friends would be on your list? Or, do you have an imaginary friend story from you or your child? (Or…can I call you the next time I’m awake at 3:00 AM?)
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Have you marked April 4 on your calendar?
I’m so excited to celebrate all the people who have been a part of Waiting for Butterflies–from my first beta readers to everyone who has hit a share button on Facebook to spread the news! Hope to see you at our book launch party at 6:30 at The Woods!